Hey guys, Cody and Kaylee here. The Unengaged Podcast. We are back this week and we have some fun little topics or I think... They're fun. Good little memories and things like that. We're kind of going to take you guys on a little trip of the last year of my life specifically. And just kind of talk about some highlights and stuff. I know the last couple of episodes we've mentioned my birthday and some of the fun things that have kind of come up with that. But I also thought that it would be... kind of a good idea for us to talk a little bit about the last year of my life being unengaged. Yep. Being unengaged. Yeah. So, I mean, obviously that's the name of our podcast. And we've kind of touched a little bit here and there on, you know, just the logistics of how we got that name and the creativeness behind it. And pretty much for me, it has, as of well, the day that this will actually air will be officially one year since my unengagement. Yes. And if you've ever been, if you've ever broken off an engagement or had an engagement not work out, you know that the first year is typically the toughest and the most amount of, I feel like, realizations, but it can also be super Mm-hmm. you know, lots of fun that kind of counteracted the parts that were not so fun. And a lot of the firsts, you know what I mean? I was thinking about some stuff, like just the first times of everything after you've been in that super long relationship, you know, like the first time doing certain things by yourself again. Super interesting. I wanted to ask you something before we go into it. I wanted to ask you if after... after the engagement not working out and being single for the first time in a long time, if you felt freer? You know, it depends. So, yeah, there's definitely been some times where I totally feel so free. But then there's some times where I'm like, I don't know if, like, it's a little different. Yeah, it's an adjustment. It's an adjustment. Like, I mean, don't get me wrong. Like, before I got into that relationship, before I was engaged, like, you know, we were there. We were in it together. Like, Kaylee used to always... Kind of make a joke and say that I had this big dick energy. And I kind of, at first, it was hard to get that back. That swagger that I had before, like, I was fully wifed up. You know what I mean? I was making sourdough and shit, you know? Yeah. It's hard to go back to that. So, I mean, there was a little bit of, I don't know, kind of like, it's kind of like an indoor-outdoor cat. Right. I was an outdoor cat for a really long time out there hunting, you know, looking for my next meal, you know, doing all those things. And then I was I was a domesticated cat for a minute, had a fluffy pillow in the corner and somebody dishing out my meals. And then all of a sudden I'm like, what? I'm going to be out here in the cold again. You know, this isn't as fun as I remember, but there's definitely some freedom to it now. Yeah. Now I'm like fully back into it. Yeah. It's getting fun. I remember my first year of like being unengaged and I don't know. I mean, same thing like you said, it had its like ups and downs, but I don't know. I just remember like, I feel like, you know, you made the right decision when you feel lighter and like freer kind of after. Like I definitely, as tough as it was, And I don't know. I had a lot of fun with it. I'm not going to lie. Yeah. You know, I think you had fun with mine, too. Yeah, I did. But no, I mean, you know, that that is one thing, actually, I will say to that is like, I guess you talk about being single again, like being freer, like obviously being freer. There is something to that. There was like sometimes, though, like where I felt like I was almost too free. I mean, you know, you were there. You were my first call where I was like, hey. want to go do this, blah, blah, blah, at the drop of a dime. Cause I don't have anybody at home that's got to sign my hall pass. I get to go, you know, like we're field tripping the whole time. You know what I mean? Where it's like, it was hard for me to come back and kind of not, everybody always talks about the roster, like filling the roster of like, you know, whoever you're like talking to or hanging out with on the side or whatever. I felt my, my roster of people was different. Right. Because when you have like, Yes. Right? and it was kind of like I had friends that were single you know what I mean but like a lot of them it's like they have kids like they gotta you know they can't be hung over tomorrow they gotta be at school drop off you know what I mean or or you know gotta be home for the husband or you know different things like that so that was one thing where I felt I was almost too free because I'm like well I get to go wherever and do whatever I want on the drop of a dime and quite honestly there wasn't a lot of things that I didn't do like I didn't pass on a lot yeah and that was something that like i would say is probably the highlight because as much of a great time as i had during my relationship i do feel like my ex kind of limited me on a lot of things that i wanted to do a lot of different experiences that would have been worth the time and the money for me but she wasn't really she didn't have the same kind of interests in things like that and also financially I think she wasn't we were so pressed the two of us I don't understand still the math to this day I think there was like a weird energy around that because I mean like quite honestly dude like think about it like the last probably year or so I felt like her and I were struggling as fuck yeah we were trying to you know pay for a wedding and like all those things but like you know I'll tell ya It's kind of weird, you know, how it all panned out. I mean, if you think about it, like one of the things like that was probably the highlight of my year or the highlight of that unengagement, free feeling, like I get to make the decisions that are going to make me happy. That's why I asked that. I knew the answer, but I wanted. It was like all of a sudden there were certain things like the biggest one for me was I had like the worst job. Like ever, like my job that I had this time last year, fucking miserable, so miserable. Like it was so bad for my mental health. Like so crazy. Like it honestly, like it was draining me so bad, but it was paying our bills. Yeah. And I will tell you what, man, I remember the day that I was like, I called my mom, you know, cause I'm like, I feel like I have to talk to somebody about it, you know? And I was just like, mom, today's my last day. Yeah. And she's like, cool. Are you going to like move home? And I'm like, nope. I'm going to figure it out. Sink or swim, you know. And isn't it wild that there's so many people out there that are even like better to this day and have been for years working a job like that one that you were working that are miserable, that are with someone that they're barely getting by with, that they're someone's going to either drag you down or make you feel lighter and lift you up. And when you're with the wrong person, they pull you down. After after that, like that was probably the first major milestone, I think. For me, like post-breakup, I think it was probably like maybe 30 to 45 days after. And I was like, fuck this job. The job quit. And it was literally like that where I was like, I remember going in and being like, all right, I'm going to give them one more chance. And I was like, I had a job offer somewhere else and this is what they're willing to pay me. And it was like almost like 50% more, like an hour or something like that. And I'm like, if you want to match it, you can keep me. You know? Because I'm like, I'll give you guys a shot. You know? Like, 50% more. You know? Whatever. But they were like, oh, it's all good. You know? Like, we don't want to pay that. I'm like, okay. Goodbye. They're like, perfect. Deuces. Like, you know, I'm out. Like, now I really have no good reason to fucking stay here. Because it was just stupid, the amount of things I was going through there. But leaving that job and then basically betting on myself and making it work. I, there wasn't a single thing. I mean, so you guys kind of have this like background context, you know, if you don't already know, like, on the side of like doing like my bartending thing and all that kind of stuff. I've been in the like mortgage business for years. probably like 15 years so I've always been in finance always been able to kind of do that kind of thing but it takes a lot of time to kind of build your business and that and like really put it all on the line and it's 100% commission so that wasn't a risk risk that my ex was willing to take and she didn't really like she she came into my life right as like rates started to go crazy so that kind of was you know she was like there's no money in this and I'm like yeah should have met me 12 months ago but you know whatever here we are um But yeah, so that is something that I've always loved and always been super passionate about. And so once she was like out of the picture, I'm like, you know what, like I have an opportunity with a new company, really love what they're doing, really love what they, you know, have to offer. And I have full flexibility with it. I'm just going to take the leap. Yeah. And quit that job I hated. Worked not even a fraction of the hours. You know, obviously I'm out there doing the sales stuff, you know, going to all the open houses, doing the things. But on my own, I'm not clocking in. No one's telling me how long I have for lunch. Like, you know, like I get to take calls from wherever I want. You know what I mean? And my mental health just soared. Like I made it work and I hustled when I needed to. And honestly, there was nothing that I... was struggling to pay. There was nothing. I didn't buy a ticket for no vacation that I had to say I couldn't afford to go on. Like I went, I did it. A sign for those of you that are working a job that you hate and you're too scared to leave. Say deuces. Leave that job and take the risk. Say fuck this job. Bitch, I quit. Take the risk. And I feel like there's always a better door. You know what I mean? That comes after that. It works out. I think it's just scary when you don't know what's next. Anytime we don't know what's next, it's scary. But I feel like there's always something better on the other side. Yeah. Well, it's like what you're always saying too. It's like all about like energy, right? So it's like a lot of times when you have something like that, whether it be a relationship or a friendship or whatever, or a job, you know, if it feels like it doesn't fit, it's not gonna. No matter how much you want it to. And so it's like, if it's giving you that much of a headache and it's like that crazy stressful and not non-rewarding to you in any capacity, like that's, the universe telling you it's not the one. Yeah. Are we talking about the person or the job? Now I don't know which one.

Both.

Both, right? Let some jobs be like that. I mean, I know you've been self-employed for a really long time, right? Yeah, but I've worked different jobs and I've worked for people. I've worked up in a waitress. I've worked in fast food. I've, yeah, I've done all the things. And even as a hairstylist, I've worked at corporate haircutting places. So yeah, I know. I know. The staff meetings be tough, man. Like some of those, you feel like you're going to war, like for real. And then you're like trying Like, are you going to have my back? Are you going to speak up? Am I going to be the only one speaking up here? Like... Trying to make sure, you know. That's one of the beauties of, like, being self-employed, you guys, and, like, really following your own passion and, like, doing it your way, you know? Yes. Like, that's the thing. It's the best. It's like, you know, there's a difference, a different kind of feeling when you fail at something when you're in a corporate atmosphere or you're on a team or something like that, you know, where you kind of get this anxiety or this type of, like, oh, no, like, I fucked up, whatever. But when it's your thing and, like, you– fail on your own like I almost feel like there's like power in that where you're like yeah well like it was my thing I failed because I failed and you're like okay gotta figure it out and then you just learn from it and you just hustle harder and yeah And there's nobody to, you can't really blame anybody. It's like, we're going to conduct, am I going to conduct a staff meeting with myself? If I'm the only, you know, if I'm a one woman show here, like, yeah, you just gotta be like, all right, well not doing that. That one again, we got to learn from those things and like keep going, you know? And I think that kind of really all in itself, that attitude is what got me through the last year. Like just, okay, this didn't work. All right. Onto the next, doing it different, all those things. But we had a lot of fun this year. We had a ridiculous amount of fun. I don't know. I don't know if you have this notated down, but like how many concerts did we go to? How many trips have, you know, literally on my way here, I was like listening to like just shuffle on my phone, but I was listening to, have you heard that song by Riley green? It's called damn good day to leave. No, I want to listen to it now though. It's a great song. Well, we'll tag like the Spotify, whatever for the song, like in the comments, if you don't know, like go listen to the song. Cause I swear that was the theme song for my year where, and it's basically him like talking about like, you know, his, his, girl leaving, whatever. And he's like, you know, what am I going to do now? Blah, blah, blah. And then he's like, but you picked a damn good day to leave because then he starts like listing all these other things that he's doing. And he's just like, well it's a good day he's like I when I pictured this I thought it'd be raining and it'd be this sad thing and whatever but sunny and I'm out fishing and drinking beer and I think I'm having a good time like you know I love that and like literally like that that's how it is that's how exactly how it was I mean we went to so many like different concerts rodeos went out you know hung out with friends that we hadn't seen in forever so many things I mean we've got to spend so much time and get closer the two of us and like quality time you know not just the hey we'll meet you there and it'll be the double date whatever blah blah blah go have dinner go home like no like we spent good quality time as friends and like had good ass times i mean we sure did we sure did the zach bryan concert that we went to we gotta like recreate that for another concert this year i don't know how we possibly could quite we could if we did it once we could do it again that's true but literally i i call this girl I don't know what, not even 24 hours before the concert? No, it was the same day. It was the same day. Mind you, you guys, Kaylee was not sitting at home doing nothing, twiddling her thumbs. She was in Texas, like on vacation, like doing her thing. I was there for my daughter's wedding. And so it was like one of those, like, you know, like she literally was across the country. And I text her and I'm like, what time does your flight get in? Yes. Yes. oh man if you guys okay if you guys have ever had a friend that has done this like with anything where it's like last minute i feel like that's always the best time it's the best time i feel like when it's unplanned the more unplanned it is the better of a time you have oh yeah so literally here i am and i'm like hey you know zach bryan who's one of our favorite artists hardly ever plays in california He's playing tonight in Oakland. You know, it's now or never. Yeah. Like, let's roll. And she's like, well, you know, my flight gets off at this time. And mind you, we live, you know, say. An hour away from the airport. An hour south of the airport. And concert is an hour north of the airport. Okay. Her flight gets in like two hours before the concert. Okay. There would literally be no way for her to go home, change, come back. I'm like, you know what? I'll pick you up from the airport. Tell me what you want to wear. Yeah. She's like, I'll go to your house. I'll grab your hat. I'll grab your clothes, get your boots, and I'll come pick you up from the airport and we will go straight to the concert. And you guys, the amount... The amount of doubt, but also like adrenaline that I had in my head. I'm like, I shouldn't. You shouldn't. You shouldn't. No, you shouldn't. But you should. But you only live once. Like, why not? Like, you know, just like the little angel devil on your shoulder, right? Like, it's like, what do I do? What do I do? But then it's like, I just was like, you know what? Fuck it. Let's go. And so at this point, you guys, I am like, just, okay, we're making this work. We're going to do this. We're going to get the ticket. We didn't have tickets. Oh, yeah. Because I waited because I told her, I said, you know what? Let's just wait it out. We'll wait until it gets closer. And then hopefully the ticket prices will kind of go down. We'll get the best ones we can find. Hopefully they're like barely at base value and, you know, we'll get lucky. Right. So here I am, um, was it your mom or, or your boyfriend that brought the key, but somebody came and left a key under the mat for me so that I could get into the house, get her boots, get her hat, do her thing. Right. And then as I'm leaving, I go to put the, or I go to grab the key, um, to like lock the door again to like leave. Right. And obviously, you know, kind of lock it up, make sure nobody gets in here. You know what I mean? And, um, as I'm going to do it, it drops between the deck. Yeah. There was like a board in the decks and it dropped. And literally I kid you not. not you guys I had six people there was a guy doing construction down the road that I knew doing like some some work on her neighbor's house and I'm like hey Steve you know like you think you can help me out bro like you know like this and that same thing he even got the magnet thing yeah he had like one of those like long like magnets like that like electricians have trying to like get like the nail that falls underneath something or whatever well turns out that the magnet that we finally got and then somebody brought one that was even stronger strength like I had literally I kid you not probably five people sitting there trying to help me get this key so that I could lock the door have I told Kaylee about this no I'm on an airplane fuck no I'm like see you there I got your boots you know and mind you there's three men on her deck like you know on their stomach thinking we can get this board up and I'm all nope this is a rental yeah we can't touch this board yes and come to find out the freaking lock or the key is like brass and not metal so like it wouldn't even come up with the damn thing they're all sitting there with a hanger trying to like get it wire all kinds of stuff it ends up falling underneath the house completely yeah that key's still there I'm like oh shit like what do I do you know and then I think at that point you just let it be and you told me and I said it's fine I have a spare one I think I called somebody else to be like what do I do I don't know if I called your mom or if I called your boyfriend and I was like you know what do I do here Yeah. And I'm like, are you joking? Like, you know, like, like I just got my, I'm all dirty, you know, like everything, whatever. But anyway, so that was that. So we go and I'm like racing, you know, down the highway on a Friday afternoon in traffic, pick her up from the airport, throw her bag in the truck, you know, and then we're on our way. I change in the car. Yeah. Changes in the car. We stopped for dinner because we're like, we really don't know who the opener is. So we're just going to stop, have a drink, let her kind of decompress. from our trip a little bit eat some food for the first time in that day and we end up looking at tickets at that point and we end up getting tickets on the floor you guys like awesome tickets yes and they were like cheap too I think they were like 200 bucks yeah it was like a piece or something which mind you you guys the normal tickets for the pre-sale of this concert when they first had came out were like nosebleeds were like that much yeah so it was a steal it was a steal and we got floor seats you know not necessarily the pit but like the floor right next to it. You know, so this is as close as we're going to possibly get. Right. So we're super excited about that. We're chilling. We're finally like all good. I tell her about the key things. She's like, no worries. So we're just stress-free drinking margaritas, had some good Mexican food at a place down the street, get back in the car and we start driving to the, to the Coliseum where the concert's going to be at. And, um, we're just living our best lives and it's, it's up in Oakland, you know, California. So it's up there and it's kind of like a weird area, you know, so we're like, it's like lock your doors when you're driving, you know, to closer to the area. Right. You know, and we're just trying to get there, trying to get there. And then I'm like, okay, you know, usually when you're around these places, you kind of have like shitty service. Like we should pull up the tickets right now to make sure that we have them before we get any closer, blah, blah, blah. Okay. Then Kaylee reads an email.

yeah

the tickets didn't get them they went to someone else apparently they were like priced so low that someone snatched them even though it said i got them they got them they never got emailed to me they got them before me like so now snatched them out of the cart yep so we get there and i'm on my phone and i'm like trying trying trying she's parking i'm like there's nothing i'm like i don't know what to do i don't know what to do there was literally no more tickets left you guys Finally, we end up buying these shitty tickets that were like$42 a piece that were like at the very, very, very top. It was like we were like, all right, well, we're here. Because they gave us a coupon, remember? Because they were like, oh, sorry, like you didn't get your ticket. So here's like a coupon instead, like courtesy prize. Like a voucher or something. Yeah. Yeah, basically, I think total is 40 something. I think we paid 20 something dollars each for these tickets. Yeah. So we end up getting there. And we're just in a mood, man. We're like, no, we want to be on the floor. Yeah, we're like, we were just like, we get there, we go over to where our seats are. We're kind of scoping it out. And we're like, God damn it. Like, we thought we were gonna be on the floor. Like, all of a sudden, like, Yeah, literally. There's all the people on the floor. They all have wristbands on. What color are the wristbands? You know, like, which ones are we going for? Like, should we see if we can find one on the ground? Like, you know, that kind of thing. And I'm like, okay, where's the gate? You know, let's see how we can finagle this. Yep. Okay. Now, if you know me, you know that this is something that I get very lucky with. you know almost all the time if i can get the same if i can get inside the place i can usually get wherever i want after that um so here we are we're like looking around this and that and i'm kind of seeing people you know where they're walking from to get down there to try and see where they're getting these wristbands so sure enough we can kind of see and then i find the lady we find the lady right because on top of that we did get a confirmation email that said Thank you for your purchase on your floor seats, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I said... we'll just say we don't have service and show them this confirmation and see what we can do. So I go up to this lady, you know, and I'm like, Hey, you know, we came in through the wrong gate. I think we, you know, missed the wristband. Here's the receipt for our floor seats. Like, you know, where do we get them? And I'm like, just trying to finagle it. And she's like, Oh, you got to go talk to somebody over there, get scanned in. Okay. And so we're walking down and it's, you know, it's the Oakland Coliseum guys. So it's very like circular. Everything is in their long corridors. So it's one of those things where they have those like little metal gates that sometimes are like zip tied together kind of thing well this one wasn't and about halfway through not quite around the corner to where you could see the person scanning the tickets there's an opening we just literally just look at her and i'm all here we go like go right around nobody asked us to see our tickets we got wristbands we are on the floor we are on the floor we're in a certain section of the floor yes so we realize that now we've made it to the floor okay we're there But there's two sections. There's the ones that have the seats, which is the one that we originally had. But obviously they're all assigned. So somebody is going to be in that seat. Yeah. Right. And then there's like the pit in front of the stage. Then there's the general admission pit where the magic happens. Yep. And of course, that bracelet is a much different color. Yeah. So here we are. We're like, you know what? Let's just see what this is about. We'll hang out down here. Worst case, we'll just kind of like mosey around until people tell us to move and, you know, do what we can do. Yeah. So we get a couple of beers at that point. we literally have spent more in alcohol than we have on the tickets. I think we were like up to like$80 at this point. So like literally a hundred bucks, like between the two of us. And it starts to get a little bit dark. We're hanging out by the porta potties. She has to go pee right before it all starts. I'm like, this is a good time. And I can kind of see where people are getting in. Right. And how they're checking the bracelets for the general admission pit, this and that, whatever. And we can kind of see what's going on. And I'm like, all right, neither one of us are wearing long sleeves. So like that's kind of, you know, can't hide our wrists. You know, what else can we do? This and that. Well, then all of a sudden I see this group of guys coming down the stairs from what looks like probably wherever they're hanging out in a green room or something like that. And they all have lanyards on. And story for another time, but I've been pretty fortunate enough to... be one of those lanyard people at a lot of different concerts with my dad and some of his friends and so i knew that when they were walking down from where they were walking down with those lanyards on we just needed to walk in with them we just needed to walk in with them no one was looking at anybody's wrist in that group okay and sure as shit there we did i said kaylee come on we're going and i grabbed her and we ran next to these guys and we just kind of walked in right behind them and literally the second that we got past the two security guards i said run yeah and and you guys we ended up having literally the best night ever like we just danced the freaking night away and sung our hearts out at one point i got on cody's shoulder and we're just i mean you guys we are right there like i could smell zach bryan's cologne like it was amazing and 20 what is it 22 dollars that was divine intervention of the universe right there yeah when we didn't get those tickets and we were able to get there so so now you guys have Like, you guys know how to sneak into... Yeah. You guys know how to sneak into four seats. But again, when you talk about energy, right, and divine intervention, it's one of those things. Like... We needed that. We both needed that, though. My ex would have said, it's Thursday night. You have to work tomorrow. We're not going to that concert, you know? Yeah. and I went we made that concert our bitch oh yeah we had a freaking blast I'll literally remember that yeah we'll have to share like a video so you guys can see for context because it was literally the most free and the cooler part about that too is like I feel like concerts now, especially country concerts too, it's like people go and they want to go get like hammered and it's all about how the beer line is super long, this and that. I told her, I said, there's no beer, you know, booth inside the general admission pit. Like once we're in, we're in, you know, so we have like two margaritas at dinner and then like one beer while we were there, like one tall can amongst the both of us. And like, that was it. And we were so happy and content. We had a blast. We had a complete blast. And honestly, I felt more intoxicated just by the energy that was there. Yeah, it was. It was just so awesome. It was contagious, for sure. And Zach Bryan concerts are a little different than any other concerts I've been to. where it's like the people that were there like they knew every song like and like they felt it you know what i mean like it was it was real genuine fans at that point yeah yeah it was really it was a good time for sure yeah moral of the story leave this leave that shitty fiance and uh go sneak into a Concert with your bestie. The universe will reward you for good choices is the way I've seen it. And like kind of the way that I feel about the last year because, you know, has every choice that I've made since then been a good one? No. You know, like I've made a lot of like tough decisions and I've made some bad choices and done some things that it probably didn't help out. You know what I mean? But yeah. I feel also there was a lot of very easy decisions and like just easy things to say yes to. And that made all the difference. Like, you know, moving out of my house, that was hard. Leaving that job, that was hard. Leaving certain, you know, friendships, hard. But everything that I got after those hard decisions like brought me somewhere happier than I was before. You know, I feel like all the things that I was the most scared of, like ended up being the things that made me like freed me the most. And it's like, you guys, that was supposed to be the hardest, you know, like most like heartbreaking year. And I had a fucking blast. Like you did. We did. You did. And you've you've done a lot. Yeah. You know, you've done a lot. I mean, it was awesome. It was really cool. I mean, shit. Think about what was supposed to be my bachelorette weekend. Like, just so happened that it was, you know, rodeo weekend here and we partied, you guys. We had so much fun. It was so much fun. I mean, my house, we did a pre-party like on the Friday before. Yeah. I had brunch the next day. I got her a breakup cake. The breakup cake was the best that she brought to the brunch. It literally, you guys, was a red, white, and blue funfetti cake. My absolute favorite. red, white, and blue. Those are my favorite colors. You know what I mean? Like I'm all America, everything. Right. And on it just said her loss in red and all red writing. And I'm just like, hell yeah, totally unexpected, but like literally the best thing. And find your friend to break up cake. I highly recommend it. Highly recommend it. You know, I think that after that, like I'm, I love buying people cake for like just anything. I know. Right. You know, sometimes you guys just deserve a cake. Yeah. It could be a birthday cake. It's so fun, like, going on Pinterest and, like, doing something thoughtful for somebody you love like that and designing it all cute and, like... That was my favorite. Yeah, that was really cool. Maybe I'll make, like, a little reel for this episode to kind of show all the highlights and you guys can see and we'll put a picture of it in there because it was awesome. Yeah. And even just, like, that whole day in itself, like, that whole weekend, really. Gosh, I mean... It was so much fun. The moments when you're with... you know what I'm talking about those friends that you just, you just, the laughs are endless. The laughs are endless. Also. Like I just, I love moments like that when you just feel so present with what you're doing, the people you're with and you're just like, okay, cool. You know, you're like, I'm happy. Well, it's like, you know, yeah, just pure, pure bliss, you know, just that right place at the right time kind of feeling and, Where you're like, I'm totally like cool and content right here, right now. And you had a lot of those moments. You had a lot of those moments this past year. This year felt a lot like, you know, I don't know, like that deja vu feeling, you know, when you get that and you're kind of like, okay, I'm in the right place at the right time. Yeah. And like, I'm totally good with where I'm at. Like, I don't, I don't think I ever had a Yeah. Yeah. turned around ran in the other direction you know because life's too short and like I just I think now I truly can recognize what that feeling is and what it means and like what to do with that you know yes you know like you're you know you're on the right path that you're making the right choices and you're around the right people when it feels like that like that the deja vu like the goosebumps the fully present in the moment you're not thinking about what happened in in your past. You're not thinking about what's going to happen tomorrow. I mean, you're just like, so here now. I love that. I, after my, um, that first year too was like similar with that. Like I felt like I, I really lost myself in that relationship. I think like a lot of us do. I'm sure you guys can relate, like whether you're engaged in a marriage, whether, you know, regardless, you know, sometimes we, especially when you're with the wrong person, um, you can completely lose yourself in it. So yeah, I remember just that year dedicating myself to like saying yes, you know, saying yes to all the things, going out, having fun, not letting anything hold me back. And I highly recommend to like, if you're newly single, like do a solo trip, even if it's a weekend trip. I did like two solo trips to San Diego. You learn a lot about yourself when you go somewhere by yourself, maybe not even like like work into it slowly maybe don't do like a full-on solo trip for your first time but like I remember I would like go out to eat by myself yeah and like see how that felt and like because anything you fight anytime you fight through something that's really uncomfortable and that's scary like I remember even just sitting down and eating by myself that was uncomfortable yeah that was scary I had been with someone for six years and then prior to that 10 years you know but like you do that more and more you overcome it you get comfortable with it and sometimes it just starts as something small like that and then you work your way to something bigger like going away for the weekend on an airplane all by yourself that's crazy i'm still not there yet yeah you've got a lot of balls for that honestly but do you see these i follow these girls on instagram um do you guys see like these beautiful girls that are single and they're like solo travelers And they travel to all these different countries and do all these things by themselves. I just, I always ask like, who's taking that picture? You know, like, you know, everybody is solo, you know? Yeah. I met this girl when I was in Hawaii. I met this girl, her Instagram. I'm going to show you her. She's awesome. You guys, she's super famous on Tik TOK too. She has a big following on Instagram, but she's like millions on Tik TOK. I met her out in Hawaii. Oh yeah. And like, she's fucking gorgeous. Her Instagram is like turtle girl fit or something like that. I'll show you her. I think I follow her. You probably do. That was familiar. She wears glasses. She has like super blonde hair. Blonde hair, blue eyes. Yes. I think so. She's super pretty. She's getting like a whole leg sleeve done right now. She's the one, I got to meet her in person and she was so cool. I had no idea like who she was and then I followed her after her and I was like, oh my God, this, I was like, okay, go girl. Like she's like social media famous. But anyway, she truly does. She truly travels everywhere and goes everywhere. Oh wow. Like by herself. Yeah. I'd like to try I think that's kind of where I'm trying to be this year. I know sometimes you'll go to a place local by yourself and like have a drink, but you also know the people that work there. Yeah, no, I'd love to see you system. Yeah, no, no, no. You got to go somewhere maybe out of town by yourself where you don't know the people that work there. I'm telling you, it's the best thing ever. Like you're going to feel weird at first, but then you're going to fight through it and then you're like, you'll love it. I think I'm going to try that. Yeah. You know, it's really funny. And I want to see you go on a... Like, I also would love to see you go on a trip, like, even if I'm not able to go. But I'd love to see you go on a big trip. Like, even with... Not even saying alone, but, like, I'd love to see you go somewhere, like, really cool. Because, like, you don't have kids or anything either. Well, I'm really trying to, you know, right now... Like, go to fucking Italy or go to, like, Greece or, like... Hold on. I want to see you go somewhere really cool. I'm just going to throw this out here, but I'm supposed to go on a big trip. And... I have had an issue trying to get my passport. Yeah. And I have ran into every single problem that I possibly can. You know, it's been crazy, you guys. And now, right now, I found an expedited service that will do it. But there's a list of things that they need, obviously, in order for me to get it. I got my social security card, my birth certificate, all those good things. You guys, my driver's license expired on my birthday. And our DMV is only open like two days a week. And the nearest, the first appointment that I could do, because I have to go in and take a picture, literally a picture and fingerprints. Yeah. So I've done everything else I need to do online already. I just have to go in for the photo. The earliest appointment they can do is like April 18th. This is, you guys, this is where living in a small town fucking sucks. Oh, no. I looked at, like, all the surrounding towns, too, and theirs are out in Temay. I didn't realize it takes so long to just for them to take a picture. They don't even let you see the picture. They won't take more than one, even if you had your damn eyes closed. How many people are getting pictures done right now? Only one of them knows how to work the camera? Fuck. Press the button. I'll do it. Here, I'll show you. I'll send you a selfie. Okay? You know? Shit. It's crazy. But if anybody has, like, a hookup at DMV or something, somebody that knows how to work a camera over there, thank you. And get me in before the 18th of April. Please DM me. It would be much appreciated. I would love to go to Cabo. Yes. We're going to Cabo next month, you guys. Hopefully. You're going to go. I don't know. At this point, I'm kind of thinking, you know, is the universe trying to tell me something or are they just trying to challenge me right now? I don't know if sneaking into Mexico is the same as sneaking into the floor at Zach Bryant. Yeah, that's a little different. But yeah, so, you know, if you have any hookups at DMV, please DM me at your earliest convenience. Yes. Crazy. I don't know. Well, I could sit here and talk about the last year of my life for quite some time, but... Well, what's your... What is your main takeaway from... I mean, a year really... I don't know what you guys think, but to me, having gone through it, a year is not that long for when it comes to a long-term, serious... Break up from very serious relationship engagement. I feel like, yeah, that's not that long. And a year goes by really fast. But with the first year, what has been like your takeaway? With the first year, I think my main takeaway is, again, kind of like what I was saying, like life's too short. You know, like say yes to the things. Like don't wait. You know, I think that it's like don't wait for the perfect time because the perfect time is never perfect. nothing's perfect. It's never going to happen. And I think there were so many things that it was like, Oh, we'll do that next year. Or we're going to go and try that, you know, in six months when we have more money or, you know, those kinds of things. And I kind of let my life be dictated by that for a good chunk of time. And, um, being by myself, I found a lot more of my, like my personality coming back of like how spontaneous I am about certain things and how much kind of just, you know, trust I put in like myself and my own like willingness to make things work. And, you know, I, I trust myself again. Yeah. I think. You feel like you've kind of, at least if not entirely, like have found yourself again. I think I'm getting there. You know, I've definitely, um, gotten back to a lot of the favorite things about myself from before that. I feel like I kind of lost. Um, but also like I'm, I'm much older now and different. And, uh, I think I find out a little bit more about myself every day you know I think we all do in some sense if we're really paying attention right you know what I mean it doesn't necessarily take some like big catastrophic event in your life to realize that but sometimes it does take that for you to be aware and that's kind of the main takeaway for me is that it's like I'd rather be more aware of those things like as life is happening and not wait for like some major checkpoint, you know, which is kind of what I feel like that was for me. Yep. I feel like a lot of times for us to get out of our comfort zones and or realize that we want to change something or finally just like do it. It's almost like something like catastrophic has to happen, either like a death, a breakup, a really bad breakup, like big life changes that force you to reflect and look at your life and look at your, you know, everything that you're doing in it, your job, your career, the person you're with, where you're living, all the things, how you're living. It really makes you face those things. And I think for a lot of us, especially the ones that are hardheaded, I'm, I'm pretty hardheaded. I have to like learn on my own, not by watching others learn. I have to learn by making the mistake. I think a lot of times it takes that, but, but it's like, it also, it's like, why, why does it have to, why can't we just reflect, look at things and, And make different choices. Why does it take something big? I think it's just human nature. Yeah. And, you know, I think that that's something that like moving forward, I'm really trying to be like more aware of just like checking myself, you know, like certain things happen, certain things kind of fall out of place or whatever. And it's like checking it before it is a big blowout. You know, I think that's something I'm realizing for sure. Yeah. Is there like something like a final thing you want to leave behind? Leave our listeners with, especially like anybody who's listening to this who is like debating leaving or maybe is single or newly single or is going through like a heartbreak or a breakup. Yeah, you know, I think if you're one of those people that you're in the place where you're debating like where you're at. you know, and trying to figure out, is this going to be better to stay or better to leave? You know, I, for sure, I'll be the first one to say that I was the one that wanted to stick it out and make the best of what was going on, even though it was so wrong. And even though, you know, forces brought me to where I am now, I wish that I would have saw it for what it was and realized that, you know, sometimes if the world keeps throwing that shit at you and they keep making it seem like oh this is just getting harder and harder and harder like sometimes you gotta kind of like submit to it and just go the other way you know and see what's behind that other door because sometimes like you have to pick yourself you know and like being the best version of yourself will bring you to the best person for you you know whether that's the person that you're with or you you know somebody else right it's like the person that you're with might see you chasing yourself and your better self and see you transition into the person you guys really want to be and like think that maybe they want to be a better person for that instead of trying to force them to be a better person you know while you guys are kind of complacent but I just you know it's that and it's just guys like again life's too short like go have fun like go do what you want to do go do the things you know and just trust yourself mm-hmm Absolutely. All right, guys, I think that's it for this episode, but we will see you next week for the next one. Thank you for listening. We appreciate you guys so much and we plan on continuing to do this. And as always, everything that we share is just to share some of the things that we've been through and hopefully you guys can take something away from it. Maybe it helps you not feel alone. Maybe you relate to it in some way or maybe it just makes you think or. Yeah, you never know. Yep. Alright. See you guys next week. Alright. Bye.